Twin Tiny PeterPans.

March 24, 2010

A pair of identical, blonde, 5-year-old boys came in for haircuts today. Normally Bang! doesn’t take baby clients, but there weren’t any adult clients today because of the world-ending snow storm. Actually the roads were dry by 10am but still everyone canceled their appointments.

Anywhoooo, when these babies arrived they were wearing matching black snowbibs over cream-colored-cable-knit sweaters. It was unbelievable, then they got too hot and took off their boots and sweaters and revealed their green long underwear, and became tiny PeterPans.

Yong cut their hair, and PeterPan #1 told Yong that he wanted to be a dress-maker when he grew up!

Then the PeterPan#2 bonked his head on the shampoo bowl because he was way too small for it. So sad.

Later Yong told me she felt bad when he hit his little head, and she said “That looked like hurt!,” and I said “Yeah! And it sounded like hurt!”

Snowpocalypse

March 23, 2010


This is Murphy and his duck. Murphy is really proud of his duck, and he always wants to show him off. Or push him against your leg. I got to take care of Murphy for a while and I was the luckiest girl in the world.  This dog has the biggest head and feet you will ever see.

Yesterday it was in the 70s and sunny, and I laid outside and got a little tiny sunburn.  And now it is snowing sideways.  And there is 100% chance that it’s going to continue snowing all night. Tomorrow at work everyone will say “Can you believe this weather?! I thought spring was here! Well, that’s Colorado for ya, hahahah!!”  Lord have mercy.

My dad made this fire for me, and I made taco soup (Weight Watchers Taco Soup, sound familiar, my Riekes??)   After the fire was going my dad started watching the Simpsons, and said “Man those are great colors.” About the colors of the Simpsons.

I got to see Barcelona last night.  It was a real treat, even though they continue to refuse to play Rich Girl.  Apparently they don’t have a base track for it, bla, bla, bla.  I don’t see what the big deal is.  Also, what does it say about your life if you have more spots on the guest list than you do friends to fill them?

21 year old turtle.

March 9, 2010

Paul Cyr, the angel that he is, turned 21 last week. This picture is of Paul in “Wash Bar,” shortly after midnight, on his birthday.

When I was in the ladies room in Wash Bar I felt like I was dressed in a boy costume because all the other ladies in there were reeaaaallllly going for it with their girl outfits. If you know what I mean.  Paul Cyr is way way too cool for Wash Bar if you ask me.  It was a good night, that started with pizza, middled with “blue drink,” ended with Paul stuck on his back like a turtle in the yard.  Luckily Bridget Cyr was there to flip him over, like the good sister that she is.  Paul told me I was allowed to write about this.  Also Paul Cyr likes Harry Potter. Which does not run in his family.

More on Yong:

She walked up to me with a little cup full of hair color last week saying “Look! Sean Penn!!!,” I was like “Sean Penn?!?!”  She was like “YES!!,” I was like “WHAT?!” Then I figured out that she was saying “CHAMPAGNE!!,” which is a shade of blonde. She thought the whole thing was hilarious, and said “Ha! Sean Penn!! The Korean version!!!” Lord have mercy.

More on another Paul, Paul Quintana:

Tonight I got in trouble because I didn’t wash the mushrooms for the salad, woopsie. I said, Dad, I never wash anything, and do you ever see me getting sick?  He said, what does that have to do with me eating dirty mushrooms?  Then we watched Precious, and he said he wants to adopt her.

I also told him about the new saddle shoes I bought, and he told me that a saddle shoe is a solid shoe, and he has always worn saddle shoes. Which is true.

Lastly, on the Oscars, the announcer called Barbara Streisand, “BARBER Streisand!”  Ha!!

Carrot Sauce

March 1, 2010

I had to go into the salon today for a class about Kerastase(a fancy pants hair product line.)

Neal asked why I had to go into work early, I said “A Kerastase class,” he said “Carrot Sauce?!”

He’s the best.

Some on Yong, more on Lupe. Some on Sean.

February 23, 2010

Ok. So. Yong is a stylist at my salon, originally from South Korea. She runs everywhere she goes, and skis on all of her days off.  She also keeps Costco packs of gum in her locker and always wants to share. She is always rubbing up on everyone because “my husband don’t snuggle,”  Which I don’t blame him for, because Yung has also told me “I never talk nicely to my husband.”

Yung and Lupe are close friends. They are always whispering and hugging, I think they have a special bond.  But you would never know it by the way they talk about each other.  I recently was trying to ask Yung where she was from, but she was too busy yapping to answer my question, so Lupe answered for her, “JAYPAN!!!” Yung heard that, and then smacked Lupe in the butt.

Also, some on Sean.

How did that boy turn out so good?  Sean’s senior football banquet was on Saturday night.  He had a speaking part, and right before his time to shine he suggested I put on the football helmet centerpiece and ride on his shoulders when he went up there.  Then he told me he was kidding about that, but he would try to make eye contact from the podium. Which he did. And then he giggled from the podium.  Later, the coaches had the most amazing things to say about him. About his character and what a respectful and respected person he is at the Air Force Academy. And you could just tell how much all of the other giant football player boys loved him.

Here is when he snuck me onto the football bus.

He’s moving to L.A. in the summer. :(  for me. but :) for him. So I guess that means :) for me too.

One by one, my favorites keep moving to that trafficy state.

Texas Wedding, and some Ghosts.

February 15, 2010

Wellll, Sarah is really married.  And Sarah, on her wedding day, was actually the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.  Kaela and I both could only look at her for a few seconds before we had to look away so we didn’t cry and ruin our bridesmaid makeup before we walked down the longest aisle in all of Houston (or the world) by ourselves.  I found out after the fact that I walked faster than I was supposed to. But who cares, it wasn’t my day.

This is Sarah at the lingerie shower, aren’t those hot underpants??And this is Sarah when the wedding hair was finished.  (at this point I was feeling a huge amount of relief.)

And these are a few of the CU ladies enjoying each-other’s company at the reception.  The people in this picture live in Menlo Park, New Orleans, Denver, and Seattle. So it was a real delight to get to hang out all together.And here are Sarah and Denver, I didn’t actually get any pictures of Denver’s face that night, because I was too obsessed with Sarah.  Oopsie, but, I couldn’t have picked a better match for Sarah though, the beautiful little freak that she is. I already knew I wanted to live in texas because of Friday Night Lights, but this wedding definitely strengthened that desire.  Texas ladies are awesome. So yappy and fierce.

So then I came back, exhausted and happy.  When I stopped at the Starbuck’s next door to Bang on the way to my first day back to work, the barrista asked me “how the exorcism was going.”  I had no idea what she was talking about, but when I got to work I learned that a spiritual mediator had come to analyze the salon, because when she was getting her hair done she “could hear the walls talking.”  Rodger videotaped the analysis of the mediator, and we all got to watch it. There are 30 ghosts of sheep in the storage closet. The other ghosts are friendly and want to help Rodger because his job is a very important one on this earth.

Also, one of the ghosts moved someone’s scone off their plate at Starbuck’s.

Going to the chapel (in a bridesmaid dress.)

February 4, 2010

Well, the time has come to leave Denver Colorado to celebrate the union of Sarah to Denver McCollister.  I’m sure there will be a lot to say about this later, but right now I will just say that there are a lot of ladies that I am really excited to see this weekend.

I have been trying to find time before this Texas wedding to get rid of the copper streaks that were still in my bangs from hairschool, figuring Sarah wouldn’t want those in her pictures. Today at 4:45 color still had not been applied to my hair, and I had to leave work at 5 in order to make my flight.  So we put the color on my hair, and then I walked home with shower cap on my head, finished packing, and then washed it out.  Now my hair looks kind of blackish, and perhaps worse than before. Oh well, I tried.

My dad drove my little ass to the airport.  On the way there we heard a radio commercial from some jewelry company that was trying to sell some kind of diamond pendant inside of a box of chocolates.  The guy was saying something like “She will be excited about the box of chocolates, but when she finds the diamond…” and my dad yelled “SHE’LL POOP HER PANTS!!!!  Thats what they should say!”  Later in the car I was sniffling because my nose was runny, which my dad hates more than he hates it when I don’t take enough showers, and he said “Ash, the one thing I want you to do when you’re down there is blow your nose, instead of sucking it up,  that way the people around you wont think you are disgusting.”

Then we saw this scary horsey:

This horse is there to greet you when you arrive at Denver International Airport. WTF?  It’s terrifying!  My dad hates this horse too, and said “Yeah, that possessed devil horse is just what people want to see before they get on an airplane.”

Geoff

January 29, 2010

Geoff is the accountant. Today I asked him if he had anything to do with direct deposit, and he said he has everything to do with it. Then I asked if he is the Master of the Universe of Direct Deposit, and he said that as far as I’m concerned, he is.

Today Geoff got his hair colored. We assistants applied his color while he sat at the computer in the basement office working on payroll, then he kept working while his color processed for 20 minutes. He looked so funny on the computer with his hair sticking up all spiky.

When he was done, and needed to be rinsed, one of the front desk girls came and told me “Gee Off needs to be rinsed.”

Sicky

January 27, 2010

Paul Quintana is sick, and so is everyone I work with. And now so am I. Which is hard for me to admit because  am constantly telling sick people “oh…I won’t get sick,” when they caution me about things like eating off of their germy fork, or sucking on their lollipop.  My immune system might be the part of myself that I am the most vocally confident in.  Maybe overly-confident. So it’s pretty hard on my pride when my immune system goes down.  Also, when I catch a cold, instead of feeling sorry for me, people like Kaela immediately say to me mockingly “I thought you never get sick??” I think I am going to make a late New Years Resolution to accept my immune system, imperfections and all.

Anyway, it is kind of hard and shameful to be sicky when doing a job that requires constant physical contact with people.  Shampoo-bowl conversation doesn’t come as naturally when you are concentrating on not infecting the client. Or dribbling snot on them.  Sometimes you see the sick stylists disappear from behind their chair suddenly, to go sneeze or nose-blow, and the client will just be sitting there in the chair looking very confused and abandoned.

Mindy Smith is playing at the Tractor Tavern tonight and I am listening to her in my bed in Denver.

Lupe, Looptey, Loopey

January 18, 2010

I got a bonus Yahtzee this weekend.  Can you believe it?

Then, tonight, I had to perform a one length haircut in class.  My model was Lluvia, the 6 year old daughter of the woman who does laundry at Bang, Lupe.  Poor Lluvia, didn’t want a haircut, and also did NOT want to sit still for an hour.  She was holding her little head at different angles the entire time I was trying to cut her hair.  I would position her head one way, and then by the time I had my scissors in place to cut, her entire body would be in a completely different position.  Or her entire body would be fallen out of the chair, which she thought was hilarious.  Sometimes we took breaks from sitting still to run some laps around the salon. This one length haircut was actually the hardest haircut I have ever done.  Luckily, I passed.

Two sideish notes.

1.  Lupe is short for Guadalupe.  Tonight I found out that Lupe went to Cosmetology school in Mexico, but didn’t go to class very much because “she was dating her boyfriend.” I call Lupe “Luptey,” but she knows that I know the pronunciation of her name is LoopAY.  The owner of Bang calls her Loopey.  I don’t know if he is being funny, or what he is being.

2. I’m finding out that people who are in the real hair world, not the hair school world, say scissors, and not shears, like the hair school people say.  I am thankful for this, because scissors is what they are.